Tapasi

Read a left blog version of the gruesome murder of a young girl, in Singur, West Bengal which suggests that the girl was raped and burnt to destroy the evidence of rape in a small pit, by police and CPM Goons. Read the police version from telegraph. The police thinks that the murder could be because of personal reason and not connected to the Singur agitation. But they don't seem to have any ideas on how a young girl can have attracted such enemies who would be ready to burn her alive(if police thought rape was involved then that could be a motive, but off course that possibility has been ruled out). The fact that the body was found just beside the area, fenced and heavily guarded by police and night guards from industrial development board(CPM Goons as per some news versions), pretty much tells the truth about the horrible crime.

Its alarming that the criminals are becoming good at destroying evidence. How much evidence can be found from a charred body. In case of the Khairlanji incident the doctor who did the postmortem failed to collect evidence which could have helped in proving rape and finding the culprits. His version was that police didn't suggest that rape was involved. Offcourse, what else can be expected when the victims are marginalized and the whole mechanism to protect people joins hands with the murderers and rapists.

abortion

The first time i was sensitized to the problems involved in abortion was while watching an old Malayalam movie. The abortion was an illegal one which lead to complications. The whole scene of abortion was scary. This movie was post 1971, when abortion was legal in India, so i will have to think it was still not widely available then. India has one of the most liberal abortion laws, which was adopted in 1971. One of the clause which makes it liberal allows the termination of pregnancy which results from failure of contraceptive irrespective of the method used (natural methods/ barrier methods/ hormonal methods). Its a great thing but some studies (read this manushi report and there is a part where a volunteer tries to access the free abortion service in a delhi government hospital) say that despite the legal acceptance, benefits of free and legal abortion has not permeated very well to all levels of the society in India due to lack of awareness, social stigma about unwed pregnancies, and some political reasons of the 70's where abortion was packaged with irreversible contraceptive methods.

Recently i was reminded of the abortion issues when i was watching the movie Dirty Dancing. More than the hot dancing and romance showcased, what i took back with me was the plight of a girl with unwanted pregnancy showed in the movie. Set in 1963, when abortion was illegal in USA, the girl had no choice other than to go to a quack who charged exorbitant rates and did a messy job of abortion leading to complications. The girl in the movie was saved by the heroine's father, a doctor but what it shows is that in such a situation she or her friends wouldn't have approached a regular doctor to save her life, fearing the legal consequences. More reason that i was shocked was the thought that such things used to happen in the US of A. So what will be situation in lots of other countries where knowledge about contraceptives are much less and abortion is still banned under law.

And these are the days when religious fundamentalism is making a comeback in a lot of countries. And we get to see news like this, of Nicaragua banning abortions of all types including cases when mothers life is considered to be in danger. The "pro-life" guys there i guess are only interested in the life of the fetus and not that of the mother. Off course i can see their thoughts(from a distance of a thousands of miles, with no knowledge about them), how they were seething with anger when they saw some poor woman carrying a pregnancy which could put her life into danger got an abortion after certification by three doctors and lived a happy life. And how they can be happy now putting any other woman in such situation either to 8 years in jail if she went for abortion or to painful death(a death row situation to an innocent woman). Illegal abortions are rampant in these countries and they are a big threat to the life of women(read this news article, which reports illegal abortions are at the rate of one per woman in Latin America) and since the "pro life" guys find it hard to do anything against them, they are trying to put the life of mothers with medical complications who can only be saved by doctors, in clear danger and get some mental peace from that. Holy, but why am i surprised.

The only thing that we can do is to increase the awareness about abortion in our own country, talk about it and help out. Its quite important, last day i was talking to my friend about legality of abortion in India and he was surprised, so was he when i told adults can have consensual sex without marriage in India:).

grameen bank

When i heard about Professor Muhammad Yunus and Grameen Bank winning the Nobel prize for peace, the first thing i did was obviously reading up about the grameen bank. The part which was interesting to me was that most of the loan goes to women and the bank found women to be better at repayments than men:). I thought , ok, women are better at repayment, ya, they can be better at following the rules of society. I searched for women bloggers who took pride in this whole women better thing. My searches resulted in nothing :), looked like no woman blogger was interested in this huge statement about women. Then i came accross some other blogs, which gave another view point explaining women being better at repayments. The loan mechanism in grameen bank works on a peer mechanism where the loan is provided to a group and if one member defaults there will be immense peer pressure(some accuses that peers could humiliate the defaulter and even cases of locking the defaulter up in the panchayat hall were heard of) on the defaulter to pay up since otherwise the whole group loses the access to the next loan. The new view point said that women are more susceptible to such pressure tactics than men and this would explain the phenomenon of women being better at repay. Holy, such unromantic people, they chucked the whole concept of women being better social players :). The grameen bank website gives this explanation -"Women are the best poverty fighters. Experience and studies have shown that they use the profits from their businesses to send their children to school, improve their families’ living conditions and nutrition, and expand their businesses. They also are more likely to fully repay their loans on time."

Then i read up these article of scathing criticism against grameen bank written by an austrian school of economics advocate Jeffrey Tucker in 1995 and 2006. Some of his points suggest that the collectivism in the grameen bank loan groups and their strict practices like joining up for weekly physical-training exercises and parades where they chant the the "Sixteen Decisions," a narrative summing up the bank's worldview and education provided in the banks style in its 18000 schools make the bank more of a cult than a financial institution. I understand his concerns about such a rigid collectivist society. But when he is worried that the collectivism advocates against dowry(and according to Jeffrey this will lead to the members not geting married or get their children married in the dowry based society), and that the collective is forcing the members to make and use pit latrines i am more than a bit amused. This fellow Jeffrey Tucker, from his words, i think is a big romantic. He sitting in a nice dowry less society sees this thing called dowry as a pretty substance and more prettier is open latrines. And i would like to imagine that if such a large group of people thinks against dowry what big change can it make.

If you read the articles you can see one thing which these people see as the more important concern, "the dominant issue right now is how best to build institutions that are genuinely market viable as verses subsidy dependent", and not the welfare of these people. And at many points he wonders if micro finance is such a profitable industry why dont the private players get into this market. And he tries to prove that micro finance stays up because of huge subsidies and grants from in and out the country. Who cares as long as it goes into improving the life of a huge number of people. And if this statement from Grameen Bank is true,
"No Donor Money, No Loans

In 1995, GB decided not to receive any more donor funds. Since then, it has not requested any fresh funds from donors. Last installment of donor fund, which was in the pipeline, was received in 1998. GB does not see any need to take any donor money or even take loans from local or external sources in future. GB's growing amount of deposits will be more than enough to run and expand its credit programme and repay its existing loans.
" those allegations are also false.

The only negative part of micro-credit seems to be the sometimes subtle and sometimes not so subtle peer pressure to repay the loan. That is the same thing which makes it a success also. And compared to very not subtle threats of legal action or physical violence by money lenders(as normal banks never reach any of these people) this seems to be much better. I have heard about Self Help Groups in India which are similar to GB's peer groups and have always heard only good about them. And i think a similar bank in India with as much reach could change a whole lot of rural peoples life for the good and protect them from lack of the so called capitalist banks and presence of money lenders who would rather prefer that the debtors remain debtors for ever.

Gorky

I never knew about the political life of my favourite author, Maxim Gorky, until today, when i was reading up about Animal Farm. Read this if you are interested. Shocked to see that such a great writer was used as a propaganda weapon by Stalin, and was probably murdered by the same poisoned communist regime. Also a little sad that he allowed such things to happen.

Sharmila Chanu

Does it take 6 years of hunger strike for a manipuri girl to be noticed by media. Does it have to be foreign media that notices her for the first time. Read the article on BBC. I did a google news search on the same, and from that i have to say none of the national Indian papers have commented on this. Does the media guys think that getting fed through the nose for 6 years in a hospital bed is an enjoyable pastime for this woman and this terrifyingly courageous protest isn't coverage worthy. Or as it started 6 years ago, is it old news?

Update(09_10_06)
Read news about the official panel reviewing the issue, recommending the repeal of the act. Also read this article. It says that Sharmila Chanu is in Delhi now to protest against the act despite warnings from doctors against her travelling.

One more.

The poor have haunting eyes, especially the children who follow with their eyes the movement of the ice cream cart, and the slow movement of the jaws where a privileged person sits eating at a hotel table behind plate glass windows. The poor have grimy skin and hair reddened with the dust of the roads they walk on. They have emaciated limbs. When they speak, their voices lack modulation. The poor have no truck with government officials, members of the cabinet or even God. They keep their woes to themselves, wisely and with immeasurable dignity.
Madhavikutty(kamal das) from her column. Read the whole article.

There she goes.

All the religions now prevalent in the world have crossed their expiry date. They cannot exert any beneficial effect on human beings. They prejudice and poison the minds of their followers. Intolerance grows to vast proportions. Rioting can occur, and violence.
Madhavikutty(kamal das) from her column.

I simply love her.

a nice guy protests against the rape law reforms in pak

Siraju-ul-Haq, a senior member of the six-party MMA religious alliance, told the BBC last month that the government's efforts to change rape laws showed that they were "following a Western agenda to secularise Pakistan".

"The government must focus on more important issues like education, poverty alleviation, price rises and the interference of the military in government affairs", while me and my fellow males in this country can rape all the women of this country and later stone them to death because we will be fucking them with less than 4 male witnesses.

The original news article on bbc.
For more details read this article.

In the mood for love

He remembers those vanished years. As though looking through a dusty window pane, the past is something he could see, but not touch. And everything he sees is blurred and indistinct. The ending lines from the movie. Will affect you more if you watch it. Simple stuff right, but something he could see not touch, its painful.

A nice sunday evening, i sat down to see the second half of the movie. I had made some tea for the occasion, and it was made to match the movie style, less amount of distractions like sugar and milk, more tea. The director sometimes was using shots through translucent glasses, i made my own by fogging my spectacles with vapors from my tea. And then comes that haunting music where they start moving in a strange slow motion, going through motions repeated in the movie, she climbing up those nice stairs from the local noodle shop, he with his cigarette with that sweet and sad expression on his face. There was love and there was pain.

The first half made me happy with the intimate shots of the characters, you see some of them, you hear some, you feel the rest, and you are in there, not somewhere far away. You feel the warmth that these nice families extend to strange people living with them. You love it. Later you hate it.

In F1 races some times we get to see a car losing its tyre and the tyre rolling on for a long distance having some fun on its own. So what happens when the same thing happens to a bus, cruising nicely on a beautiful Indian highway. I don't know, because I was sleeping :). By the time I woke up the driver and conductor had succeded in finding the tyre using the tiny torches mounted on made for Indian nokia phones. Quite commendable, but the search lights were not strong enough to find the lost bolts. It helps that buses have 4 tyres in the rear than 2 as in f1 :), and nothing bad happened.
The connection with F1 didn't stop there. I realised it when I woke up after another nap in the next bus. The driver was exceptionally skilled for the great circuit. The road was bumpy, there were deadly chicanes mounted on slopes. The curbs were fitted on sides which overlooked scary depths. It was raining constantly. It was one surprise treat, for the passengers along with the great scenery they were enjoying. The precision with which the bus was cruising was amazing, though the way he overused the tricky looking curbs kept me excited as well as worried :). And the most funny thing is how he was getting irritated with back markers who were not quick enough to give him the race line.
Its a great route, despite the bad condition of roads. Once in a while there were boards announcing coffee estates. There were pretty little tiled houses. I remember seeing a little tree house.

compulsary sterilization

We have sure heard of compulsary sterilization program in india during emergency, but this report may have some other countries topping the list on this crime. But still it looks like india should come second after germany if you read the details.

petty bullshit :)

so much light around,
i was searching for darkness
i knew at the bottom, who didnt
but i couldnt find it, the light is dazzling me

my friends told me, they cant see a thing
they saw omens, they heard voices
i smiled and couldnt believe it
my heart wept when i smiled

do i deserve this light of ignorance
i know i wont pay for it
but i feel guilty to enjoy this happiness
my head droop in shame, indulgent in petty bullshit

da new day

da declaration
(friday : in the bus, me rambling incessantly without any support from roomie)
me: monday is a new day, from monday onwards, i am going to be more orderly, me will reach office every day before 9. Will work properly.
roomie: hmmm.
me: no buddy, its going to be new, brand new.
roomie: hmmm.

da oracle
(sunday : evening in the bus, mama calls)
mama: did you lose your mobile, i rang up a while before and someone else picked up.
me: no, i had it all the time.
mama: may be i dialed the wrong number.

da preparation
(sunday: night, preparations for monday, i set alarm in mobile for 7, and two reminders at 7:05 and 7:30)
me: foolproof.

da new day
(monday: morning 7:30)
me: what happened to my alarms. roomie, did you switch it off, roomie, give me my cell.
roomie: brrr.
me: roomie, where did you hide my purse.
roomie: brrr.
me: roomie, roomie, roomie.
roomie(the tank with 6 pegs inside, not a morning person): brrr.
me: where's your mobile, let me ping mine.
roomie(jumps up): i don't see it.
( roomie runs around the room searching for something).
roomie: good yaar, they got my purse but they didn't steal my cigarettes.
roomie: hey even my matches are safe.
me: i know, even if they took it, i know you have hidden reserves :). hey good thing that you didn't lock the door yesterday.
roomie: shit.
me: new day indeed :).

ps: thanks to robbers for not stealing my pc and my movie dvds(in which case i would have hunted you down and crushed your balls), thanks to the kind neighbor's who lend us money to get to the office.

down by law

Venue : Collective Chaos
Movie : Down by law (Jim Jarmusch)
The theatre was really funny, a small hall with foldable(but good) chairs kept at different levels. Dark, and a little scary :). The movies are projected by a dvd projecter on a small screen, pretty neat setup. Later my friend told me about the first time he came there, when they without realizing got in through the wrong entrance and were met with a big crowd. Guys and girls who couldnt find seats were lying down on the front part, the gap between the gallery and the screen and enjoying the movie, and they joined them. Exactly matching a dream of mine. That dream was much more cooler, with all the people lying down and watching the movies.
The movie started off with dark scenes (and it was b&w), and i was kinda getting an impression that its going to be a serious movie. Two of the protogonists(Jack and zack) were having bad luck, as in they had nasty friends. Both lands in jail. From here onwards, there were some lighter moments and lots of people were laughing behind me. I was thinking all the time, hey this is a serious movie, what will the director say if they found you laughing at such small things. It all changed when roberto benigni came into the same cell shared by our heroes. Both the guys kept staring at benigni, and benigni was fidgeting uncomfortable under the stare attack, and nowhere else to go. At one point, he dramatically takes out his notebook and with his italian accent says " If looks could kill i would be dead". The whole bunch of us lost our control, and from that point i realized, we are watching a nice comedy and not a serious movie :). Dim wit that i am.
The movie was very funny and nice, particularly after that. They wander around in a swampy area, which looked great in b&w. Also worth remembering was the woman who worked with Jack(incidentaly a pimp) in b&w, pretty and pretty much nude :).

zombies talking

Deados connected by the dead lines
Or Nerves made of copper wire, or even of nothing,
Talk about zombies, or see them here

Grievous tales pour out in silence,
Tales of loss, loss of words,
I can see his face, drawn and pale, and

I feel the death, for we are connected.

Let go, planning to say that to myself very often from now.

day dreaming

Every time i am going for a change, i have this whole bunch of dreams. That's what's so cool about changes. This time, i have this visions of having a better social life, meeting a lot of old friends, and concentrating more on my work :). And the change is new job in new city. Today i was reading Harry potter and suddenly i found one more dream that can be useful, get back to the classroom. I never had a great time in college or schools, but i absolutely enjoy sitting in class rooms. Its so peaceful. So i was thinking i will find like minded friends and pay a teacher to treat us like students :). When the initial enthusiasm wore off, i settled on joining some classes which are already available. Literature class comes to mind, but i am not sure whether they are open for anybody. More practical one is learning a new language, then we are absolutely ignorant students, at the mercy of the teacher.

good stings

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/4855682.stm

ariyallur

Will tell how and why I reached tanjore later, and how I had a nice time there. This is about my exit from tanjore, to chennai, where I was to meet bala. The travel plan was all figured out, the last night, and I just had to remember the place name, from which I could get a fast train to chennai, the title of the blog. I got into the right bus, early morning, enjoyed the nice ride watching dilapidated but nice temples, pretty paddy fields, and cute school kids. Some water bodies with water lilies were giving me added kick. After getting down from the bus, I had to cover a distance like 500 m on foot to reach the station. I was deftly navigating that route, which is a single road, to the station, asking directional queries in highly poor tamil, to every nice person on the road. The road is narrow, with shops and few houses at the sides, some of these houses were pretty similar to the shops with a short veranda, and at one moment quite unexpectedly as I was passing one of those houses, a pretty lady, dressed traditionally, darted out partially of the door. Partially in the sense , her feet were still inside, and she was spreading the fumes of incense sticks to the air outside. She saw me and with a little disgusted face got back inside and closed the door. Not the best thing for her to see in the morning :). But seeing her made me quite happy.

The station was a nice place and I just fell in love with it. The long platform, mostly open surrounded by pleasant landscape. I enjoyed waiting there. The train journey was also nice, even though there were no seats available and I was sitting on the floor:). I was scribbling little posts on a paper with sketch pens:) and mentally thanking the people of the reserved compartment for not kicking me out.

ways to eat a water melon

- make thin slices, and eat them carefully, making sure that the flesh does not touch your face, but just goes inside your mouth, very unromantic.
- make big slices, with wide bottom, bite in, let the flesh touch your cheek, let it caress your upper lips, very sensual.
- take one hemisphere of the water melon as such, and hug it, keep it close to your heart. use a knife which is not very sharp to cut out pieces from it, and slowly eat them, very intimate.
really, to learn such things you should have time with you, like me :)